Tuesday, October 25, 2011

Why I Write BDSM


I find the aspect of BDSM intriguing. I enjoy reading it, so it would follow I enjoy writing it. This lifestyle and subculture has many complexities and is often criticized and misunderstood. There’s a level of intensity between characters in these stories that isn’t usually found in typical vanilla romance. When I first decided to incorporate elements of BDSM and later write a full story, I have to admit I was intimidated.
Had I read enough? Did I understand the dynamics well enough to portray the characters accurately? And couples as loving, caring people? Through recommendations from well-known authors of this subgenre like Joey W. Hill, Ann Jacobs, Maria Isabel Pita, Marilyn Jaye Lewis, the 1-800-DOM-help series authors and many others, I’ve acquired quite a library of BDSM non-fiction and fiction books.The emotional, physical and psychological areas in a BDSM relationship can create problems and conflicts such as insecurities, jealousy, dependency issues, fear of abandonment, physical injuries, etc. Some of these issues may also cause conflict in a traditional romance but not to the same degree. These difficulties provide lots of interesting ideas for stories. Imagine the level of trust involved when a character first allows a new lover to tie him up? Or uses a whip, or performs some other element of pain and/or pleasure.
In this kind of power exchange activity, communication and trust is essential. Of course you don’t have to be involved in this lifestyle to enjoy reading or writing it. I believe most of us are voyeurs at heart and curious about the dynamics of Domination and submission, Sadism and Masochism, bondage and discipline. We want to experience it, if only through our fantasies and through the eyes of the characters in the book. Even if we have no desire to ever feel the sting of a flogger.

Writing BDSM fiction has been a writer’s journey for me, talking with authors who write in the genre, reading non-fiction and fiction books. There certainly is an ‘edge’ to these stories that I like and writing them well is not easy. I’ve enjoyed reading all of the 1-800-DOM-help books. There’s a similar thread that these books share but each author has taken a very unique twist. Each one explored a different area of the lifestyle too. All of them great reads!

A well-crafted BDSM scene is an adrenaline rush, euphoric, and arousing for the reader and the writer. Author Susie Bright in her non-fiction book “How to Write a Dirty Story” says that once you’ve hit your zone and you’re writing the perfect erotic scene, it’s like, “an orgasmic cocktail.”

CONTEST: Reminder. My contest for a chance to WIN a copy of Dial B for Bondage is going on until November 15th. Check out the post on October 10th (link below) and post a comment to enter in the drawing.
http://kathykulig.blogspot.com/2011/10/contest-time-with-author-island.html#comments

6 comments:

Anonymous said...

There is something so intriguing about BDSM that I enjoy writing and reading it too. :)

Amber Skyze

Kathy Kulig said...

I am too, Amber. And I'll be writing more. :) Thanks for stopping by.

Katalina said...

Wonderful post Kathy. I can't remember a time when I wasn't drawn to BDSM fantasies-I just didn't know what to call them. I put my Barbies in bondage, lucky dolls! lol
I love that quote from Susie Bright, Ms Bright is so right!
XXOO Kat

Rae Monet said...

Great post, Kathy.

easchechter said...

I write BDSM stories because the dynamic can be so interesting to watch unfold. You learn a LOT about your characters in a scene with a Scene.

And, well.... it's FUN to write!

Kathy Kulig said...

Hi Kat. Barbies in bondage? Too funny! Ms. Bright is a great author.

Thanks for stopping by Rae. :)

easchechter, very true about watching the dynamic unfold. A challenge to write as well as fun.