Ellora's Cave Chaos-Live Talk Radio

Naughty, hilarious, taboo, behind-the-scenes, sexy, etc,. etc...Are you curious yet???

On August 1, founder and Chief Strategic Officer Jaid Black will launch Cave Chaos, a hilarious, behind-the-scenes glimpse into the inner workings of Ellora's Cave. The weekly, hour-long, live talk radio show airs every Monday from 4 to 5pm Eastern Time (1-2pm Pacific Time) on New Dissident Radio. The first show airs August 1, and you can participate! Keep reading to find out how.

The shows are anchored by blatantly and unapologetically in-your-face hosts Jaid Black (@JaidBlack) and Lisa Marie Gray (@ECBadGirl) and will cover every taboo topic under the sun as it relates to the female sexual experience. If the subject matter is politically incorrect and considered off-limits, Black and Gray are all over it. 


Jaid Black

Each show will have several segments. Here's what's planned so far:

1.       Only in Ohio: Black and Gray's unique take on the wacky and down-home things that happen only in our little corner of the Midwest.
2.        Cave News: Updates on new releases, sales, gossip, and everything else you were dying to know about Ellora's Cave.


Lisa Marie Gray

3.         Weekly Feature (Here's where you come in): Each week, Black and Gray will invite callers to discuss a topic. Topic for our first show on August 1 is Embarrassing Masturbation Stories. To participate in the discussion, call 234-200-3977
4.        Me Myself & I: Our She-E-O's monthly review of sex toys. First show features the eponymous Squeal Wheel.

Monday afternoons: 4-5pm EST. Click Here: New Dessident Radio

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*Quick Reminder: I'll be attending Romanticon this year. Taking a road trip with EC author Cris Anson. I'll be participating in a workshop with the 1-800-DOM-help series authors titled: BDSM Top to Bottom and signing copies of my books. See you there!!

Hot Sci fi and Pirates: Interview with Christine d'Abo

I'd like to welcome author Christine d’Abo to the Passion Sense blog for an interview today. She’s talking about her new release that came out July 6^th     at Ellora's Cave
No Master.

Hi Kathy! Thank you so much for letting me chat with you.

-Tell us a little about the book and where did you get the idea to write this story.

I’ve been writing seriously for six years now and I’ve been published for four. Many of my ideas come from me having an  image pop up into my head. At that point I’m already asking myself, what if…and the next thing I know, I have a story!

I wish I could say I’m mercenary about my ideas or have a master plan when it comes to my series. I don’t typically. Typically, I create a universe in my head and then wonder about the type of people who populate it. That is how my Eurus colony came about (Eternal Bond series) and why I’m now writing about space pirates (Bounty series).

My newest book, No Master is book three in the Bounty series. I wanted to explore the type of person who would lead a group of cut throat pirates in space. The Admiral of the Black quickly morphed into Korbin and he had a lot of trust issues. A fun but challenging character to work with.

- How did you get started writing novels?

I’m one of those crazy people who have always written. It wasn’t until I was home on maternity leave with my second daughter that I started writing seriously. Basically, I was looking for a way to save my sanity.

I began by writing a historical romance. It was terrible. I learned a lot though and at least knew I was able to finish a novel. I may a few more attempts at different romance sub-genres until I started The Bond That Ties Us. Sci-fi romance is my favorite thing to write.

- Are you seat of the pants writer or plotter?

I am a total pantser. I tried to plot a few times, but find once I’m done plotting, I no longer want to write the book. For me, half the fun is figuring things out as I go.

- If you could turn any of your books into a movie which book or series would it be?

Hands down, I’d pick The Bonds That Ties Us. I really love the world I’d created there and to have a chance to see it on the big screen (little screen, Internet thing…) would be amazing.

- Which actor screams SEXY to you?

Oh, this is a hard one. I have a type you see. Usually tall, black or dark brown hair and blue eyes. So many actors fall into that category and yet, I know not everyone thinks the same as I do. I’m more than a little in lust with Jeffrey Dean Morgan (Supernatural, The Losers), Michael Fassbender (X-Men First Class, Jane Eyre), Gareth David-Lloyd (Torchwood). That said, Gerard Butler is at the top of my Want to Shag list. J

- Do you write full time or work outside of the home?

I have a day job and yet I do manage to get in 10-15 hours of writing in a week. I get up early, write on my lunch hours, stay up late, pretty much anything to get some writing time in.

- How do you balance writing for more than one publisher?

I’m still learning how to do this! This spring I had to learn how to negotiate with multiple editors from different houses on deadlines. Being up front with them, letting them know what’s going on, and finding out about wiggle room was critical. It certainly left me with no time to procrastinate.

- Are you an outgoing person?

LOL Yes. Sometimes I’m a bit too outgoing. I’ll talk your ear off and not even bat an eyelash. I’m also slightly hyper and tend to bounce around. Standing still isn’t something I do.

-Do you write a novel straight through? Or revise as you go? Plan a whole series in advance? Or does the series evolve?

I tend to write a novel straight through. I learned early on that I can’t revise as I go, or else I never get the damn thing finished. I don’t tend to plan my series either. I generally introduce characters as supporting cast and then want to learn more about them. I suddenly have a series on my hands.

- Do you use Beta readers?

I have a group of amazing women who I work with before my stories ever reach an editor. Typically, I only send my critique partners my final draft, but on occasion I do use them for “sanity” checks. Normally, it only takes them asking me a few questions for me to realize what’s wrong. I wouldn’t be where I am without them.

If anyone is interested in learning more about me or my books, please visit me at my website www.christinedabo.com or come say hi over at Twitter (Christine_dAbo).

No Master

By Christine d’Abo

Blurb:

Book 3 in the Bounty series.

No man in the galaxy inspires more fear than Korbin, the Admiral of the Black. His life as leader of the pirates leaves little room for trust, so when Korbin’s second in command disappears without a trace, he suspects the worst.

Zain Strand has left his life as a sex slave behind and risen within the pirate ranks. But he’ll abandon it all to rescue an old friend from recapture by the slavers--even if that means a suicidal confrontation with his old master. He doesn’t expect Korbin’s arrival, doesn’t want Korbin’s help...but Korbin gives Zain no choice.

Posing as Master and slave to infiltrate a slave auction, Korbin and Zain embark on a journey of lust that rapidly reveals their deeper feelings. When Zain’s old master discovers their ruse, Korbin must do everything in his power to save both their lives and their newfound love.

Naughty Secrets

Nothing is more intriguing than a naughty secret and it looks like Allie Standifer will be revealing a few HOT ones in her new release from Ellora's Cave: NAUGHTY NATURE It's part of the 1-800-DOM-help author series. Check out the blurb and excerpt. I'm sure you'll agree this book is one you'll want to read.

NAUGHTY NATURE
Release Date July 22
Ellora's Cave
ISBN: 9781419935190

BLURB:

Aria’s always had a secret need to give up her normally tight control, but she’d never dared to act on it. Until one night a mysterious card with 1-800-DOM-help appears in a very personal place. For the first time in her life Aria’s taking a chance on fate and the promise of a stranger to discover her every veiled desire.

ER doctor Mac Hudson has always known who he is and what he wants. Now he’s looking for a sub to explore all the erotic cravings and fantasies he wants to share. One hidden glimpse of Aria and Mac’s ready to claim the petite sub in every way he can.

A single night of passion is all she expected, but with her handsome Dom she got so much extra. Now Mac’s asking for more and Aria doesn’t know if her naughty nature is up to handling a dominant alpha male for more than a single encounter.

EXCERPT:

Chapter One

The expensive, elegant yet unadorned card felt heavy between the smooth skin of her fingers. Aria knew it was only her imagination and anticipation giving it more importance than the business card deserved.

1800-DOM-help

The who, how and why remained unanswered. Aria knew the where. Right smack dab in the middle of her personal tool box, under her bed. Normally something appearing out of nowhere would freak her out, sending her running for the nearest police department, but interest kept her feet firmly planted in her apartment.

Should she? Shouldn’t she? Nice girls didn’t want to be dominated, did they? Good girls never fantasized about being taken in the ass, right? A normal woman wouldn’t want to submit to a man, give him complete control over her body? Let him pleasure her anyway he wanted?

Shit! Why was this so hard for her? At thirty-four Aria Dunson knew her mind and lived a generally guilt-free existence. But something about this card made her yearn for all the wicked dreams to turn into reality. To let the fantasies that only lived in her mind out to become actuality.

“Screw it,” she muttered and picked up her phone with slightly shaking fingers punched in the number.

“Thank you for calling 1-800-DOM-help. This is the Operator. How many I be of assistance?”

The male voice that floated over the line was smooth and smoky, with just the right touch of sexual innuendo.

“Hello?” The Operator asked when she didn’t say anything.

“Um…hi.”

“Hi, back. May I help you with something?” Amusement rang his sexy voice.

Right, she almost smacked her head with the cell phone. “Yes, I received your card and wanted to get a little more information.”

There that sounded a little better and more like her normal take-charge self.

“Ahh, I see. Are you interested in the role of a Domme or a submissive?”

“Oh no… I mean...crap…umm… Dominated. Submissive. Or at least I think so. You see I’m not too sure, but I do know I’m not calling any man master or licking feet. Oh and I have no desire to eat dinner off the floor in a bowl marked Fido and I don’t share well so there’s no chance I’d want to be passed around like a large party tray.” She babbled nervously, thinking of all the bondage sites she’d looked over, late at night with a glass of wine in hand.

The Operator’s husky chuckle caused things to tingle low in her stomach. “I’m here to ensure you make a wise decision, Ms….”

Check out Allie's books here

Bright Lights & Romance in the City

I’m still trying to catch up after returning from the 2011 RWA Conference in NY City (June 28-July 1). You can’t help but feel the adrenalin rush when surrounded by at least 2,000 romance writers, editors, agents and other professionals. As much as I wanted to sightsee, I didn’t want to pass up the workshops, signings and keynotes. I do plan to come back to see a show and check out some of the tourists spots shown on a guide map Carina Press and Smart Bitches provided. Museum of Sex? How did I miss that? (5^th Ave. at 27^th Street.) Darn.

Don’t you love the view from our room? (photo at the top of post) I roomed with romantic suspense author, Autumn Jordon. She was brave and drove us into the city. After we arrived on Tuesday, I took a preconference session on screenwriting and social networking, by Bill Pace, Jeanne Bowerman and Kim Garland. Great workshop.

The book signing started at 5:30 and I sat next to Kieran Kramer, a Rita finalist and a sweet lady. And also Joyce Lamb, a paranormal romantic suspense author from Berkley. I was telling Joyce about my book Damned and Desired and told her it had a shapeshifter coyote and hawk. Somehow with all the noise in the room she heard wolf and dolphin! She said she couldn’t figure how I worked in the dolphin in the desert. “Dolphin?” I exclaimed. “There are no dolphins in my books.” I nearly fell off my chair laughing. We’re still chuckling over it, and I imagine we’ll remember this signing for years. I’m reading her book True Vision. Awesome read! Paranormal suspense. Drop everything and go buy it, really it’s great.

At times the conference seemed more like running a marathon. Between workshops, appointments, the goody room, luncheons, and book signings, I’d grab a banana, a yogurt or a cup of coffee at Starbuck, and charge off to the next event. The keynotes were wonderful as always. I’m not an emotional type person but I think every time I hear Sherrilyn Kenyon speak, I get weepy. Inspirational? Yes, definitely. After listening to her speak, it’s hard to whine about the writing life. 

                                    

                                                             (Times Square, NYC)

Ellora’sCave gave their authors a lovely breakfast one morning with a nice gift. A really awesome treat. You don’t want to know how expensive breakfast is in NYC. The city does have some fabulous restaurants in the area. Down a street called Restaurant Row the Liberty StateFiction Writers met at Becca’s, an amazing Italian restaurant. I also ate at Junior’s across the street and swear I could’ve made a meal out of their cheesecake but only had ONE spoonful to taste. Honest.

One highlight was the FF&P Chapter’s Gathering for the PRIZM Awards. I was up for the novella category. I received third place and I’m very proud, especially when you consider the company: NYT Best Seller Pamela Palmer placed 1^st and Sci fi author and Nebula Award finalist J. Kathleen Cheney placed 2^nd. A big kudo for me. I also got to see a friend of mine Maria V. Snyder. She’ll be going on a month-long book signing tour in Australia and New Zealand. Yay, Maria!


     (Daisy Harris, Kathy and Louisa Bacio)

My other big highlight was Friday night when I read from my book Emerald Dungeon at the Happy Ending Lounge in Chinatown. This reading was part of an event called Ravenous Nights and sponsored by Lori Perkins. Three other erotic romance authors read from their books too. Louisa Bacio, Daisy Harris, and Gwen Masters. (See photo, sorry we didn’t get Gwen too) I’m so glad my friend, author Mitzi Flyte (aka MacieCarter) came with. We tried getting a cab for all five of us. Louisa had her hubby and Gwen rode in separate. But they didn’t have any SUV cabs left. The only way to ride together would be to take a limo, the attendant said. At that time of night on a Friday, two cabs wouldn’t have been that much cheaper. Louisa’s dh offered to get the limo if we paid the tip. Worked for us.

   (me getting into the limo for Ravenous Nights)

The traffic was horrific and we were running a tad late. Louisa sent a text to Lori Perkins: THREE AUTHORS, ONE LIMO, ALMOST THERE. The Happy Endings Lounge was an interesting venue: Red velvet walls, tables and black vinyl seats among dim lighting. It used to be an erotic massage parlor so you can figure out where they got the name “Happy Ending”.  Everyone did a fabulous job reading and we gave out door prizes. We had an audience of about twenty. Afterward, we walked to a Chinese restaurant a few blocks away and the food was fantastic. Very fun night. And Lori Perkins and Debra Hyde were great hosts.

It was an amazing conference. I managed to do some networking, made new friends and even got writing done. Sleep? Well, not much. If you talk to author KeriStevens, ask her about the cute outfit she wore at the Carina Press party.

Now, I can’t wait for the RWA conference recordings so I can listen to all the workshops I missed. Back to work. Yay!! Sorry, I didn’t have many photos. I was so busy I forgot. I promise, promise to take lots at Romanticon. With all those Cavemen, I’ll have to take lots. (Sept. 29- Oct.2)

Hot Summer Nights in New York City

Ravenous Nights

As I’m scrambling with last minute packing for the RWA National convention in New York City from June 28-July 1, I’m also finishing a writing project to meet a deadline and deciding what to read for the Ravenous Nights. Ravenous Nights is a reading series celebrating erotic romance writers. It takes place the first Friday of every month in New York City and is sponsored by Ravenous Romance Publishing. Four erotic romance authors, including me, will be reading from our books. The reading will be on Friday July 1^st from 8-10 p.m. at the Happy Ending Lounge, 302 Broome Street, New York, NY 10002 212-334-9676. http://www.happyendinglounge.com

There's lots of buzz going on about this event in the city. Check these links out:

http://www.zvents.com/z/new-york-ny/ravenous-nights-celebrates-hot-summer-nights--events--194443385

http://eventful.com/newyorkcity/events/ravenous-nights-celebrates-hot-summer-nights-/E0-001-039809087-9

http://newyork.localtiger.com/new-york-city/new-york-events/literary/ravenous-nights-celebrates-hot-summer-nights-97763.html

http://www.nypress.com/event-2966-ravenous-nights.html

http://apps.facebook.com/blognetworks/blog/ravenous_romance_authors/

The authors reading are: Louisa Bacio, Gwen Masters, Daisy Harris and Kathy Kulig.

I know this is at the same time as the Rita/Golden Heart awards, but you can hear about the winners later if you’re interested in checking out some NYC nightlife in Chinatown. Door prizes will be given out too.

♥

Louisa Bacio:  Louisa will be reading from her book: The Vampire, the Witch& the Werewolf: Threesome in New Orleans By Louisa Bacio

Blurb: Haunted by paranormal abilities that she can’t control, and plagued by nightmares about a demon that seeks her soul, Lily Anima travels to New Orleans in search of salvation.

In the French Quarter, Lily dives into the paranormal world and enlists the help of an unlikely couple: a vampire, Lawrence Justice, and a werewolf, Trevor Pack.
As the trio encounters ghosts, voodoo and unspeakable evil, will Trevor and Lawrence be able to help Lily turn her powers into a gift rather than a curse? And when Lily discovers that she needs to lose her virginity in order to embrace her powers and get the demon off her back, will the twosome be able to survive as a threesome?

Bio : Louisa Bacio enjoys soaking up the sun in Southern California, and spending time with her family. Sex University: All-Girls Academy also is available via Ravenous Romance.
For a short erotic paranormal tryst, “The Wait” can be found in Rekindled Fire: An Anthology of Reunited Lovers.

In addition to writing and editing, Bacio teaches college courses in English, journalism, film studies and popular culture. Drop in for a visit at http://www.louisabacio.com

www.facebook.com/louisabacio

♥

Gwen Masters:  Gwen wasn’t sure what she was going to read when I talked to her, but I’m sure it’ll be hot. She has several books out and one her readers love is One Breath at a Time. Her latest book, A Week in the Snow, (releases 6/27) at Total E-Bound.

Bio: Gwen Masters has seen hundreds of her short stories published in print and online, and her erotic novels have been translated into half a dozen languages. When she's not writing smut, she is diving into research on interesting yet obscure topics, hopping a plane every few weeks, and masquerading as a serious news journalist. She splits her time between a home on the Georgia coast and a little place on the outskirts of Philadelphia. Check out Gwen at:  http://www.gwenmasters.blogspot.com

♥

Daisy Harris: Daisy, too, will be making a last minute decision. When you have a number of awesome books, how do you choose? Her Ocean Shifter series is quite popular. She can’t go wrong with erotic paranormal—shapeshifters, deities, ménages, etc. (my favs). I’m sure we’ll be in for some great sexy scenes.

Bio: Daisy wanted to be a fiction writer at 11, but first became a doctor and a medical writer then found fiction writing again. Currently, she writes for Siren, Ravenous and Ellora’s Cave. Visit her at: http://www.thedaisyharris.com/

♥

Kathy Kulig: I’ll be reading from my latest release Emerald Dungeon, part of the 1-800-DOM-help author series.


See you in NYC!

And thank you to Lori Perkins and Debra Hyde for inviting me and hosting this event.

Ghost Hunting - Ready to be Scared?

This weekend Dh and I went to New Hope, Pennsylvania and decided to check out their famous Ghost Tour. New Hope is said to be the most haunted town in the United States. It’s a cool place along the Delaware River with historical buildings, eclectic shops, art studios, B&Bs, restaurants and pubs.

Many of the houses date back to the 1700s. Dh and I stayed in the 1870 Wedgwood Inn , named after the Englishman Josiah Wedgwood who invented the famous Wedgwood blue bone china. The inn has some interesting history which is connected to the Ghost Tour. I’ll explain more later.

We took the tour Saturday night and learned that the New Hope Ghost Tour is the longest running ghost tour in the US and possibly in the world. Adi-Kent Thomas Jeffrey began the tour in 1981. She’s an author and paranormal investigator. She’s known for several books including: Ghost in the Valley, Across the Land from Ghost to Ghost, and Bermuda Triangle.

I have to recommend the ghost tour. It was a lot of fun. The history was fascinating and the ghost stories creepy, and they gave me chills more than one time. Cameras were welcomed and encouraged. Sometimes people report sensing “things”. A tap on the shoulder, a scent, an image in a window. Others photographed orbs or images. A few people said they captured orbs on their camera. Orbs are thought to be spirit energy but can also be camera artifacts caused by raindroplets, dust and insects.

Logan Inn, New Hope

A couple stops we made on our tour: The Logan Inn. The oldest continuing running Inn in the US and probably the most haunted. During the Civil War, bodies of soldiers were stored in the basement of the Logan Inn in the winter time when the ground was too frozen to dig graves. When there were too many bodies, they began cremating them. A few woke up during the cremation. Today, soldiers are seen roaming the halls. Another ghost is said to be the daughter of the original owner who tucks guest in at night, opens drawers, moves furniture. People also report hearing voices.

One house we passed has an apartment upstairs. The woman living up there says many times she comes home and cabinets and drawers are open but the apartment is locked up tight. She closes everything and gets up the next morning and the cabinets and drawers are open again.

In one story, she tells about a pair of pearl earrings she received as a gift from her dad. And one time she was putting them on but dropped one, and it fell down between the boards in the floor. She didn’t want to pull up the board without asking her landlord’s permission, so she left it there expecting to check with the landlord the next day. When she woke up the next morning, the earring was on the pillow next to her. We have a picture of this house with a possible orb above the second window.  

 Possible Orb above middle window?

At the Wedgwood Inn where we stayed, the owner was planning an addition. As the contractor began excavation, he told the owner, “I think you need to see this.”

Trap door under table leading to secret tunnel

Under the ground between the gazebo and the house was a large tunnel. And beneath the floor of the gazebo was a trapdoor leading into the tunnel. The tunnel leads underneath the house.

Secret tunnel between gazebo and house

They determined it was part of the Underground Railroad. It was a vast network of people, secret routes, safe houses, tunnels and hidden rooms used to hide fugitive slaves during their escape to the north to freedom. People risked their lives to help these slaves. The owners of the Wedgwood Inn decided not to do the addition and preserve the tunnel as an historical site. In a room outside the dining room, there’s a viewing box that looks down into the tunnel. (see photo).

Viewing box that looks down into secret tunnel that hid fugitive slaves.

The Wedgwood Inn supposedly has two ghosts one of a 12 y/o slave girl who appears to tell her tale and an old waiter with a bloody shirt. I didn’t see either but took a picture in our room and perhaps photographed an orb? See the sphere over the fireplace.

Possible orb on fireplace?

There were many other stops but one particular story that gave me chills was called The Hitchhiker. Two couples were driving down a country road at night and saw a young man dressed in a brown jacket and brown pants, carrying a backpack. He had light blond hair and striking blue eyes.  They didn’t pick him up and continued for about five miles. Then they saw him again! They couldn’t believe it. There were no other side roads so it wasn’t possible for the guy to have gotten picked up and dropped off ahead of them and no car passed them. They again didn’t stop. Then, they entered New Hope and were crossing the particular bridge we were standing under in our tour. These couples saw the hitchhiker again. This time they stopped and asked if he’d like a ride. The guy didn’t say a word he just vanished. Other people in the area have reported seeing The Hitchhiker in the Bucks County area.

Happy ghost hunting. Have you been on a ghost tour? Where and what was your experience?

Networking Magic at Conferences

Marriott Marquee-Location for RWA National 2011

I can tell the RWA National Conference is coming up (June 28-July 1) by looking around my office. I've begun sorting clothes for the trip. I hate waiting until the last minute. I'm also going out of town before the conference, so I'm packing for two trips. Anyone else started packing yet? Or am I the only crazy one?

If you have started packing, have you also thought about how you plan to network? Are you pitching your manuscript to an editor/agent? Do you have your pitch down? How about an elevator pitch so it'll roll off the tongue? How are your social skills? Most writers are introverts, including me, but I'm getting better. I even took a class recently with Jonathan Maberry and Keith Strunk called Act Like a Writer which used acting techniques to improve communication skills. It was tough and painful at times but well worth it.

A writing conference offers one of the best places for networking with business professionals, colleagues and friends. But have you found yourself tongue tied at an editor/agent pitch, or trying to speak to a group of people only to find your witty humor has missed the connecting flight?

To be most effective, you must sharpen those communication skills and avoid a few bad habits. People form impressions within the first 10 minutes, or less, of speaking with you. How do you gracefully start up a conversation with a stranger? When there are hundreds of attendees at the larger conferences like RWA National and Romantic Times, the eyes can glaze over and the urge to go find a corner to hide in is overwhelming.

First of all, take a breath. Don’t overload your brain with everything that’s happening in the room. Focus on the immediate six–foot circle around you. Think before you speak and always remind yourself, “Am I behaving in a manner that will make a good impression?”

3 Rules for Successful Communication:

1. Listen – without interrupting the other person.
2. Question– the person for more information on the topic.
3. Encourage– more discussion including other ideas, future plans or goals.

Ways to Improve Communication:

–Reveal some confession. “This is my first national conference and I feel overwhelmed.” “In my pitch session, I was so nervous I couldn’t remember the names of my characters.” A good icebreaker.

 –Weave pauses into your speech. Don’t try to convey all the information on your topic in one breath. Give the other person an opportunity to absorb and interject comments.

–Smile! You’ll be more approachable. Other body language applies here–stand tall, dress professionally and make eye contact with people you are speaking to.

–Compliment people, but be sincere. Introduce yourself to others. If someone pays you a compliment use that as an opening for a conversation starter.

KEEP A SHARP EYE OPEN FOR OPPORTUNITIES, BUT DON’T BE A SHARK.

 –Be warm and considerate. Respect people’s privacy and opinions. Gossiping about and badmouthing other people can too easily be overheard, even in your room, on an elevator. DON’T DO IT!

 –Be Positive. To give a positive impression, speak and act positive.

 –Be empathetic. If you spend your time trying to understand someone’s point of view rather than convincing her of yours, you’ll build your image.

Behavior to Avoid:

–Sarcasm. Making spontaneous sarcastic remarks even if you don’t intend to hurt anyone has a negative impact on people’s impression of you.

–Interrupting. Interrupting a speaker can create a less than favorable impression for you, if not cause tension and anger. If you catch yourself doing it, stop and apologize. If you’re not sure if the person is finished, politely ask, “Are you finished?”

–Ignoring people. If you don’t take time to say hello, or stop to listen to another’s ideas or good news, others will not want to deal with you in the future. Our lives are so busy and rushed and it’s easy to forget to pay attention to our actions. But people remember rude–and courteous–behavior.  

–Being halfway there. When you are speaking to someone, don’t scan the hundreds of conference attendees behind her looking for other friends or favorite authors. (See ignoring people). Or explain by saying, “I’m trying to find so and so, please excuse my rudeness.”

–Hogging the conversation. It’s not all about you. Even if you think it is. Give others a chance to talk. (See Interrupting.)

–Offering unsolicited Advice. Don’t do it. Try this on a friend: “Hi Jane, want some advice?” Watch her face tighten.

–Giving insincere compliments. Politeness and courtesy can be overdone especially in insincere compliments. On the other hand, don’t criticize people in public.

10 Ways to Start a Conversation with Strangers at Conferences:

 Starting a conversation with strangers is difficult because you don’t know their interests. At conferences, you have a common point of interest—books.

 

1. Comment about the conference, keynote speaker, awards ceremony, etc.
2. Ask where the other person is from, or other background information.
3. Pay a compliment, a sincere and honest one, of course.
4. Ask if he or she is a writer, and if so, what does he or she write.
5. Ask for advice. “Should I wear the jacket or not?” “Is this pitch line better than that one?”
6. Ask for help. “Where’s the goodie room?”
7. Ask for an opinion. People love to give their opinion.
8. Ask, “Have you attended any good workshops so far?”
9. Ask for the best way to get around town, points of interest, local restaurants, etc.
10. Recommend any good craft books? Workshops? Read a great book lately?

There really are no magic tricks to successful networking, maybe a little luck. If you want to leave a positive lasting impression and make the most of your time at a writers conference, develop good conversational skills.

What do you hope to accomplish at your next conference and please share any tips, experiences or horror stories. We all can learn from good and bad experiences.