Erotica is Not a Dirty Word

 

With Guest post from Dr. Charley Ferrer

Romance authors, especially erotic romance authors often get the ‘frown’ when we tell people what we do. Even family and friends would prefer we write something else: perhaps travel guides, medical textbooks, literary fiction, murder mysteries, anything as long as it doesn’t have sex in it. And there’s nothing wrong with writing the other books I just mentioned, they all take talent and hard work.

But somewhere along the way, the idea of two people who struggle to overcome obstacles in their lives, fall in love and express that love sexually is a bad thing, or something we shouldn’t talk or write or read about. That’s the impression I get by the feedback from people who condemn the romance/erotic genre. Maybe out culture should have more of this on prime time TV and less of the serial killers, murders, abductions, body parts, and fights. Kids can watch this violence during the dinner hour too, or practice violence in their role-playing video games.

Since the 50 Shades of Grey came out, some of the negativity improved. Women (and some men) who never read an erotic romance book before, thought, Hmmm, this is pretty good, to the tune of over 70 million copies. And they started reading more. But there are a lot of wonderful erotic romance authors out there. Check out the authors on http://www.ellorascave.com  What I’m not crazy about, is a new term going around: “Mommy Porn”. I think that’s negative. First women of all ages read erotic romance, not just young mothers. And porn is derogatory and objectifies women.

Last month the mayor in my town objected to an interview my community paper did on me. He felt it wasn’t appropriate for young people. The article discussed how my husband and I are restoring our 100 year old Victorian home and a little about the books I write. No excerpts. The details of the issue are here if you’d like to read more:

http://easton.patch.com/articles/future-of-west-word-paper-uncertain

http://www.lehighvalleylive.com/easton/index.ssf/2013/02/west_word_must_change_or_risk.html

If anyone wanted to send a Letter-to-the-Editor of the West Word paper giving their support of the interview and the paper write to: editor@thewestword.org

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Dr. Charley Ferrer responded with the following Letter-to-the-editor. And I’d like to share her views with my readers. I took Dr. Charley’s BDSM Writers Workshop for Authors in NY City last August. It was a weekend long-workshop with detailed lectures, visits to leather/fetish/lingerie shops and also a two-night visit to Paddles, a BDSM club in NYC. If you’re an author who wants to write accurately in the BDSM genre, this is a valuable workshop. www.doctorcharley.com

HATE CENSORSHIP by Dr. Charley Ferrer

 

Burn all the papers. Restrict residents from owning radios. Dictate the sermons churches can discussion with parishioners. Ban all books. And provide residents with a list of appropriate topics to discuss in public!

Perhaps by ensuring the above, Mayor Sal Panto can foster the Steppford Wives mentality in his community he seeks to foster by censoring the voice of the media.

It always amazes me that politicians will talk about defending our morals and
“what’s good and decent” while they tell us their version of what is acceptable. Mayor Panto’s comments sound like the Comstock Law all over again. Censorship at its most insidious!  Isn’t that what the Mayor is doing by demanding only his approved articles and topics and threatening to replace the West Words editorial leadership?

In reviewing the articles in question, I find they only endeared me to the location. Imagine meeting an author who’s restoring a 100 year old Victorian home with her husband. Or learning that a community can evaluate where it can improve its efforts in serving its members. I’m lucky if my next door neighbor says hello as he passes me in the hall.

Life isn’t black and white. We all live in the gray where situations arise and our children are influenced by others more so than ourselves. Should I mention the movies our teens watch or the videos they spend hours playing; movies and videos filled with violence and discrimination; which foster the unconscious belief that another person’s life isn’t worth much and can be easily disposed of? Ironic how we’ll cover our sons and daughters eyes at the movies when there’s a kissing scene, yet we have no objections when the kids watch Jason Myers stab campers to death or criminals kill and rape women. Isn’t it hypocritical how we allow our children to be inundated with killing and rape in their movies and video games and yet object to the mention of a woman who writes erotica.  

Personally, I like to know all the aspects of a place I plan to move my family to.  The good and the bad this way I can make my own decision. That’s my right as an adult. Besides if the paper has something in it I find objectionable, I’ll use my God-given and government approved rights to TURN THE PAGE…as I do with the sports section.  

Live with passion,
Dr. Charley Ferrer
Clinical Sexologist, Educator
TV/Radio Host & Producer
Award Winning Author
Sex Expert for Fox News Latino
(718) 916-4124